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#099; getting tired of it
Jessica Wakeman, over at The Frisky, published a great post today titled “17 Phrases We’re Tired Of Hearing About Women” about the cutsie and/or insulting ways language refers to women. My biggest pet peeves from the list? Princess; Drama Queen; Being a Pussy. Seriously – since when did being associated with pussy become a bad thing? Always? That just seems so weird in my book! You’d think people – especially straight men who probably use the phrase more than others (I’m seeing jocks and popped-collars in my mind when I hear the phrase) would want to be associated with pussy.
by shobe90 via tumblr
But I digress. The article got me thinking about things I am tired of hearing about women or because I’m a woman. My list, after the jump.
- Girls don’t drink whiskey. In reality, whiskey is the only thing me and my girls tend to drink (except our sunday mimosas and bloody marys, but give me a 7&7 or a jack and diet any day of the week).
- I’m “a boy” because I’m not all “yeasty” (to quote dear friend BP) and when I get all “yeasty” (I think he means at all emotional?) it “creeps him out”. I have seen fully grown men act this way – everyone gets emotional about some things – would you call it YEASTY if it was a male linebacker or Marine? I thought not.
- I’m a “tom boy” because I don’t wear make up. Worse? When people ask me why I’m wearing make up – sometimes it’s just nice, most of the time I couldn’t be bothered. How hard is that to understand? Men wear sportscoats to dive bars when they want to feel important, I put on mascara, let it go.
- Women with short hair are obviously lesbians.
- Bisexual woman just want the attention.
- All women are liberal democrats.
- All women are victims.
- Women are incapable of ‘dating around’. My girl friends are SO much better at keeping track of suiters than my guys friends, and against the stereotypes, the girls in my life are the ones far less emotionally attached than the men.
- All women like to shop. Unless it’s for books or music, I very rarely can be bothered.
- I’m friends with a man, thus I must be trying to steal him from his girlfriend. Really? There is seriously so much relationship insecurity in this city sometimes it makes my head spin.
- All women are on a diet/starving themselves. Yes, I weigh 90 pounds, but I doubt I’ve ever actually tried to diet a day in my life. I happen to enjoy food, and drink, and dessert, and everything else about ingesting.
- Woman = Feminist. Please don’t ever assume anything about my politics just because of my gender.
- All women are bitches.
- I’m tired of the phrase “hoe”.
- Women hate each other. My mother is my best friend in the world. My closest friends are women from the ages of 19 to 45 from all over the world. I encourage them, support them, celebrate their victories, and mourn their losses. There is nothing like the bond between women – sisters, lovers, friends, family – so if you see us being catty, assume it’s out of love!
I suppose these are mostly stereotypes that drive me up the wall, but don’t you have any of those? Things that just grate on you? To quote Peter Griffin of Family Guy, it really ‘grinds my gears’!
What stereotypes really irritate you? Are they based on gender? Race? Politics? Religion? Geography? Feel free to vent here!
Bisexual woman just want the attention. AMEN.
12. women = feminists.
it’s interesting that you put this in there; to me, there seems to be a pretty major backlash against identifying as a feminist, and many young women–who want to have access to the same educational and employment opportunites as men, who expect to be paid the same amount as men for equal backgrounds and work productivity, and who enjoy the freedoms of walking around alone and dating whomever they see fit–refuse to identify as feminists. Egads! Someone might mistake you for a hairy-arm-pitted-anti-male lesbian! End of the world!
YES. I just… GAH! of course, there are college freshmen out there who make out with their girl friends to impress drunken frat boys – or even, more seriously to explore their sexuality in a ‘comfortable’ environment, but once we’re beyond Jungle Juice, it’s like, get real!
I don’t disagree with you here, as to the social repercussions of the word, but I meant it more as a “please don’t assume I’m liberal just because of my gender”. I don’t consider myself a liberal or a feminist, because of my personal political philosophy, and a lot of time I get flack for that!
The thing about a lot of these is we (women) use them too. Maybe we go for the sterotypes less, in terms of being hard on each other, but I for one know that I have told guy friends to “stop being such a girl”.
The one that really gets me though is “for a girl” i.e.: you know a lot about sports for a girl, etc. A well rounded woman who can talk in the same breath about politics, pop culture and last nights scores should not shock people. We should also not have to dumb down what we know or box up what we are interested in so that we are not “know it alls” or “scary/intimidating”. The other one is that all single women are depressed about being single and are desperately hunting for a guy.
I’m sorry, I can’t resist this quote from the ever hilarious Peter Griffin of Family Guy:
“You know what really grinds my gears? This Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan with all those little outfits, jumping around there on stage, half-naked with your little outfits. Ya know? You’re a… You’re out there jumping around and I’m just sitting here with my beer. So, what am I supposed to do? What you want? You know, are we gonna go out? Is that what you’re trying to – why why are you leaping around there, throwing those things all up in my, over there in my face? What do you want, Lindsay? Tell me what you want? Well, I’ll tell you what you want, you want nothing. You want nothing. All right? Because we all know that no woman anywhere wants to have sex with anyone, and to titillate us with any thoughts otherwise is – is just bogus.”
Ha ha ha!!! Classic.
- El Rojo
ps – oh, and bed bugs really grinds MY gears, as Stella pointed out in her blog, or really, people who get bed bugs (no offense Stella, lest you got your bedbugs from one of your neighbors) and then because they live next door to me then I have to go through the insane ritual of getting rid of them, even though I don’t have them, as a preventive measure. Needless to say, I too, will be going off the grid for the next several days as my apartment is being treated this Friday.
I try not to use “pussy” in the pejorative sense either, but I use “dick,” “prick,” “cock,” and “asshole” all the time. So clearly I’m a man-hating hypocrite.
I guess it depends on how you define feminist. I’d call a pro-woman, pro-choice, pro-gay Republican a feminist, just as I would use the same descriptor for a pro-woman, pro-choice, pro-gay Democrat, Libertarian, Whig or Cocktail (my preferred party). I don’t think feminism has anything to do with a particular pole, moreso with a general attitude. Sadly, I think a little feminism (or pro-womanism) has been lacking on both sides of the aisle lately.
Kat – love your point about being well-rounded! Knowledge doesn’t discriminate based on gender!
Alex – YES YES YES. ♥ Family Guy like woah, and you!
Lauren – we are all such manhaters, aren’t we? Ha!
Brian – wow, people took this whole feminism bit far more seriously than I meant them to! For your information, I do not ascribe to feminist political theory, thus I am not a feminist. People who call themselves one simply because they are “pro-woman” in your words haven’t actually looked into the school of thought behind the word. It’s a rich history that I have a degree in, so I can’t help but define it clearly when it comes to my own beliefs.
I do agree with you though, “pro-women-ism” has been lacking!!
Tina, that’s a good point, although I doubt most people think of the more radical socio-political underpinnings of feminism when they see the word “feminist”. Words, just like the political movements they represent, evolve in meaning and intent. How many “redefinitions” have feminism undergone? First wave? Second wave? Post-structuralist feminism? Post-feminism? I can’t keep track of them all! I doubt anyone would confuse a modern Democrat with early neo-Jeffersonians or anti-Federalists. Regardless, I applaud anyone who espouses a pro-woman, pro-gay, pro-choice agenda within the GOP. Those misogynistic, homophobic, anti-choice sentiments are what pushed me away from the GOP years ago (in college, I was a fairly socially liberal Republican).